Zanpakutou Runner
by GregTH. The Eleventh Espada
Summary: An adaption of Red Dwarf Back to Earth with Bleach, Ichigo & Friends wake up in our world and discover they're just characters from a Manga, Knowing their Series is about to be cancelled and they will die, they track down Tite Kubo to plead for more life
1. Where are we?

**ZANPAKUTOU RUNNER**

**Chapter 1**

Ichigo groaned as he awoke…He instantly began searching in his memory for any clues of what may've happened to give him such a massive migraine. However his attention drew to something else, the warm, gruff, fuzzy carpet he was lying on…He could hear chatter awake as he opened his eyes

_"What size is this?"_

_"This sir is 50 inches of pure HD pixel power."_

_"I Like it!"_

_"It's too big, it's only for the bedroom"_

Ichigo groaned as he began to right himself, as his vision became clear, he noticed where he was...

In an Electronics store

He quickly glanced at all angles, The entire store was filled with TV's of all sizes, even the walls were covered in them, and a nearby salesman and what looked like a married couple were just a few feet away from him.

_"What the hell!" Came a shout from a TV, Ichigo quickly turned to the source of the noise and on the TV, he saw…himself_

"What the…" He began to panic as he watched an Image on himself play on multiple TV's, It was showing him being covered in a bright white light until he faded into nothing

_"Ichigo!" _

"Rukia!" Ichigo shouted as Rukia appeared on the TV Screen, The same thing happening to her, a bright white light began to consume her

_Ichigo panicked as he grasped the sides of the TV, the image looked so real, like Rukia was _actually _on TV, and once the bright light consumed her…_

_"Ahh!"_

_*Smash!*_

_Ichigo turned to the source of the noise, as his eyes widened at sight_

_A Cardboard cutout advertising a sale…had a Rukia shaped hole in it_

_and out of that Rukia shaped hole…walked out…_

"Rukia?" Ichigo asked as he began to approach her

_What was that?" A Employee asked "Did you hear something smash?"_

_"On TV" The Customer explained_

"What the?" She gasped as she realised where she was "Where am I?"

"I was hoping you could answer" A voice said, Rukia turned around and came face to face with Ichigo

"What's going on?" she asked him "There was this-"

"Bright light?" Ichigo asked "Same here"

"What's going on?" Rukia asked

"No Idea" Ichigo groaned

_"NEW EPISODES OF BLEACH, THIS TUESDAY ON TV TOKYO!"_

_Ichigo Ignored the voiceover from the TV as he and Rukia continued to check their surroundings_

"Ishida!" Rukia shouted, Ichigo turned to her and then turned to what she was looking at, an Image of Uryu being consumed by the light was now on the TV screens

_"DAMN IT!" He shouted before the light consumed him_

"Is it HD Ready?"

"It's a version of HD ready, yeah"

_Ichigo and Rukia ignored the Salesman and the couple as they heard a shout erupt from the far left, they turned their heads and theirs eyes widened at the sight…_

_Uryu was literately fired out of a TV screen, halfway across the store, and landed through a table_

_Ichigo was half tempted to laugh at sight, but his brain was just convoluted with too many thoughts at the moment. _

_"Ahh!" Came another scream, Ichigo and Rukia quickly turned to another TV screen, this time it was Inoue who was being consumed by the light._

"Ahh!" She screamed as she fired out of a TV Screen on the floor, she literately glided along the carpet until she smacked into a wall "Ouchie…"

_Inoue leapt up Happily as if nothing had happened, Ishida got up, clutching his back in agony. Ichigo & Rukia looked at the TV once again, this time Chad was being consumed by the light_

_and then he was fired out of a TV_

_did a flip _

_and landed on his feet_

"He's good at that" Ichigo groaned

_Uryu groaned as he began to walk, he waltzed over to Orihime_

"Are you alright?" He asked, she nodded "Any idea where we are?"

"**Nope**" Came two simultaneous voices, Uryu and Orihime turned over and came face to face with Ichigo and Rukia.

"We're in a department store in Tokyo " Chad said as he appeared beside them

"How do you know?" Rukia asked, Chad pointed to sign that advertised the store as _"The Cheapest Electronic store in all of Tokyo"_

"T-Tokyo?" Ichigo choked out "How the hell did we get here?"

_"What a sound system eh? Sounds just like you're in the with them"_

All five turned to the source of the noise, a salesman trying to sell a TV to a couple

_"_"_We're in a department store in Tokyo"_

_"How do you know?"_

_Everyones eyes widened at this, those were Rukia's and Chad's voice, saying the exact same things they said just a few seconds ago and if they only payed attention to the images onscreen, they would've noticed why they had just heard their own voices_

_"Bleach" The salesman chuckled _

_"Is this a new one?" The male customer asked _

_"I don't really follow it myself" The salesman shrugged "Anime…it's all a bit crap isn't it? I mean the Ichigo guy is way too overpowered"_

"Who's he?" Uryu asked no one in particular, he was too far way to hear the mention of Ichigo's name but had heard the rest

"No clue but I'm guessing he's a pompous know-it-all ass" Ichigo grunted

_"Every time he's close to losing, he gets some massive power up" The salesman chucked "Talk about rubbish"_

"How did we get here?" Chad asked "There was a bright light and then I was literately thrown out of a TV…"

"I dunno but it shouldn't be to hard to get back home" Ichigo shrugged as he began to make his way to the exit "And Aizen's nowhere to be seen, so it can't be all that bad"

…

"We were literately thrown out of a TV!" Uryu shouted but Ichigo had already left the store "Moron…"

* * *

"Is it me or is everyone…staring?" Orihime asked as they got onto an escalator, as it had turned out the Electronic's store was actually on the ground floor of a mall, with no visible exits, so they were attempted to find one of the second floor

"Also they look like they're smiling…and why are they taking pictures?" Rukia asked as many people took of Photo's of them "I don't understand, can they see us?"

"That's Impossible" Ichigo protested, still dazed and confused as to why he had seen himself and his friends on a TV screen and then actually _thrown out _of a TV Screen "We're in Shinigami form, they can't see us, but if they can see us, they're probably laughing at how short you are and they're taking pictures to show their friends

_*Smack!*_

"Say that one more time, I dare you!" she roared as Ichigo held his bruised jaw

_"Oh man, they've nailed the characters personalities!" a person shouted_

_"They're awesome cosplayers!" another shouted_

"Cos…play?" Uryu asked himself as they reached the second floor

"Come on" Ichigo said as they got off the escalator, onto the second floor "Can anyone see an exit?"

"No" Chad grunted

"Nope" Rukia shook her head

"Maybe their's a exit through that store" Uryu said as he pointed to nearby store

"Worth a shot" Ichigo shrugged as he and the others walked in.

_The five proceeded to split up to find an exit in the store_, _as they continued to search, Uryu ended up stumbling into the Anime and Manga section of the store, he decided to back out, considering now was not the time to browse to increase his already rather small Anime/Manga collection, but as he was leaving something caught his eye, a small Manga on a shelf, that read-_

_"Bleach Volume 4: Quincy Archers hate you"_

But wasn't only the title that caught his eye...

it was himself…

he was on the cover

…

He quickly grabbed the Manga and flipped it open, his eyes widening at the sight

"Guys…" he squeaked "You might want to see this…"

* * *

This has been the highest rated choice on the poll on my page for so damn long and I've FINALLY got around to writing Chapter One

This is based on "Red Dwarf: Back to Earth" which is based on "Blade Runner", hence the title "Zanpakutou Runner",

And before you go "Z0MG TH3Y e|\|D UP !N AN0Th3R W0RlD AND U DON'T EXPLAIN IT? YOU DUN GOOFED UP!1!" I **WILL **Explain how they ended up in our world…towards the end, it's a PLOT TWIST

and yes, this story IS Set in Japan, and before you go "Why are they speaking English in Japan?" I rightfully reply;

"Fuck you, Because I said so"

Have a nice day folks *Waves*

Go to my profile and vote on my Poll if you wanna see more Bleach (& Possibly Naruto) Goodness!


	2. A Quest for More Life Begins

**ZANPAKUTOU RUNNER**

**CHAPTER 2**

"Guys…" Uryu choked out rather loudly "Come see this"

"We don't have time to be browsing at Manga, Ishida!" Ichigo snapped as he turned towards him

"Kurosaki…you won't believe this" Uryu said as he picked up another Manga from the shelf

"Damn it Ishida!" He shouted as he walked towards them

_"They're even in character! I Love these guys!" A nearby man said to his friend _

_"Dude, they're so realistic, it's creepy" Another said _

_"What the hell are they talking about?" Ichigo asked himself before a woman ran up beside him_

"Dude, you look Ichigo so much, it's scary!" she laughed, Ichigo's eyes widened at this

"Y-You can see me?" Ichigo gasped "A-And how do you know my na-"

"This" Uryu said as he handed Ichigo a book

_"Bleach Volume 1: Death and the Strawberry"_

_That he was on the cover of…_

…

"WHAT THE HELL?" Ichigo shouted as quickly flipped open the Manga, he gasped as he looked at a page that consisted of Him kicking Rukia in the behind "This…This is"

"There's more" Uryu said as he handed him volume 4

"This…This is how we met!" Ichigo gasped as he browsed through it "W-What…"

"At the risk of sounding childish, I'm Scared Kurosaki…" Uryu mumbled

"What does this all mean?"

"What are you two doing?" Rukia shouted as she ran to their side "This isn't the time to-"

"Rukia" Ichigo interrupted, handing her a book "Look"

"What? It's just me on a mang…."

_It was her on the cover of Manga labeled "Bleach Volume 2"_

"What…What the?" She gasped as she quickly opened the book and scanned through it

"These recount all of our adventures" Uryu said in a shocked voice as he glanced through several more Manga "The Menos Grande, The Soul Society, Hueco Mundo, it's all here…Bleach…this is us…we're characters from a Manga"

"That's Impossible" Ichigo said as he gasped "W…We're characters from a Manga who've somehow escaped the Manga world…into the real world"

"Guys!" Chad shouted as he and Inoue really ran to him

"Chad, you have to see this-"

"No, You have to see this" Orihime said as she held up a DVD labeled "Bleach Series 1, Part 1" with Ichigo on the Cover

"What the hell!" Ichigo shouted as he grabbed the DVD case "We have a freaking anime too?"

"I'm not real…" Rukia said as she covered her mouth with he hand "I'm a character in a manga"

"'Probably explains why you're so short" Ichigo said, Rukia didn't even glance at him "Just trying to lighten the mood…"

"Okay, Okay, Calm down" Uryu instructed "Obviously, it's extremely disturbing to find out that we're just characters in a TV Series, and naturally there's going to be a period of disbelief. but we have to keep this in perspective"

…

"**WE'RE NOT REAL! WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?**" Orihime screamed

"I think that's pretty much put it in perspective, don't you?" Ichigo asked

"This is just too weird…" Chad Grumbled before he remembered her was carrying another DVD "You might wanna check this out" Chad said as he handed Ichigo another DVD labeled "Bleach: The Finale". Taking a quick glance at the back, he discovered something

"This is what's happening right now" Ichigo said to everyone, they all huddled around each other, Ichigo opened the case to find…nothing

"There's no disc in it" He grumbled, until Uryu pointed to the _Coming Soon_ sticker on the cover "Damn, it's not out yet"

"The Finale" He began to read off the back "The gang are hurled into the real world where they are just characters from an anime/manga. Knowing they will die in the final episode-"

"Die!" Uryu shouted

"Ichigo & friends, in best blade runner tradition, track down their creators for more life." Ichigo continued

"How are we gonna do that?" Chad asked

"Easy, 'Hello Mr Creator-san, Please give us more life!', See?" Orihime said with a smile, the rest merely shook their heads

"First-" Ichigo continued reading "they try to track down the actors who voice them…and their metaphysical odyssey begins."

"S-So What Happens next?" Rukia asked

"Doesn't say, It's a five-parter" Ichigo explained

"Oh, not a five-parter, I hate five-parters." Uryu groaned "What if my Seiyu isn't in that night? What if he's busy?"

"We've got a lot more to worry about…" Ichigo said sadly

* * *

"So what's going on" Rukia asked as she and Ichigo took a seat on a sofa in a furniture store

"Ishida, Inoue and Chad are going to get some money, we haven't got a yen between us" Ichigo groaned

"Money? How are they going to get money?" Rukia asked

"Some second-hand store. Ishida's gonna try and pawn his glasses" Ichigo explained

"…Aren't they his only pair? What's gonna do about seeing?"

"He figures he can go and hour or two without them…with some help ofcourse" Ichigo shrugged

"Hey!" Rukia said as she and Ichigo stood as Ishida, Inoue & Chad came into sight "Any luck?"

"They wouldn't take us seriously" Uryu grumbled "They thought we were from a hidden camera show"

"We even offered to throw in his cape" Chad said "Still no deal"

"How are we gonna trace our creator?" Rukia groaned "We've got no transportation and no money…"

"Hang on…I just got an Idea" Ichigo said with a smirk

* * *

After seemingly hours of digging around in sofas in the store. They finally placed the stuff they had found on a table infront of them

"Let's see" Rukia began "We've got 15 combs, 2 Cell phones, 4 packs of gum…eh…_those things_"

"2 condoms" Uryu said what she clearly couldn't...

_Ichigo quietly slipped them into his pocket_

"2 Pairs of reading glasses"

_Uryu quietly slipped them into his pocket_

"And 19 Pieces of Popcorn"

_Inoue quietly slipped them into her pocket_

…

"Seriously?" Rukia asked her, she merely shrugged in response "What about the money?"

"So far we've got ¥1569…" Ichigo said as they picked up the change they had found

"Now what?" Rukia asked

"According to the back of the dvd box, we get on a train and we go to an anime shop called _They Walk Among Us_" They said before they began to leave, Chad neatly folded up a piece of gold paper into the shape of a sword and left his work nearly on the table

"Wait up.." he said as he followed after them

* * *

_One Train ride later_

"Here we are" Uryu said as he walked into the store

"This is just too weird" Ichigo grumbled as he and everyone else entered

"Look at this" Rukia said "They got all this stuff, They've got a plastic version of Sode no Shirayuki, I've got my own doll and-"

_she gasped in sheer delight_

_yes…they even had a chappy doll_

"Ichigo, buy me it!" She commanded

"Are you crazy? No w-OW! Damn it Rukia!" He snapped "How many times have I told you not to kick me in the shin"

"You know, it's no wonder people consider you two a couple" The cashier chuckled

"Me and Him? Get real" She scoffed although Ichigo noticed a small hint of red on her cheeks

"Gotta say, you are some pretty damn good cosplayers" he smirked

"I was just wondering if you could help us" Ichigo said as he walked up to the cashiers desk "We're Trying to Find the Creators of Some Manga Named Bleach," Ichigo explained as the cashier stared at him "We're Trying to find out if it's Ending or not...But here's kind the weird thing...We're not Cosplayers or anything,...We're the actual Characters...They're was this kind of…Weird White Flash and...Dimension...thing"

"Dimension Skid?" He Asked, Ichigo hesitated, but nodded "Happens A lot this time of year...one Minute you're fine, the next, WHOOSH! Ooh Where Am I? You're in a new dimension, You have to be so careful!"

"Thank god for that" Uryu sighed before Turning back to the others

_"He's Insane" He Whispered, Rukia, Chad and Orihime nodded in Agreement_

"So…you're after, like, cast info?" The Cashier asked, Ichigo nodded "I can't give you any numbers but I know who can, El Presidente of the official Bleach fan club"

"We have a fan club?" Uryu asked

"Yup, Nothing that guy doesn't know about your series" He explained "New guy just tool over, Bit of a fanatic, Changed his name to Brian Reach, people have to call him 'Mr ", His sitting room looks just like the Kurosaki clinic, he even sleeps in his closet. he's not like us, he's a bit weird"

_They merely nodded with wide eyes in agreement_

"Brian, dude! It's noddy here…sorry to interrupt the world of warcraft mate…Uh guess who I've got in my shop?…Go on guess….no…no not them…no…no…no"

_"This is gonna take a while" Ichigo groaned _

"No…no…no…no…who?"

_Ichigo looked up and smiled_

"No"

_and then he scowled_

"No…No…shall I tell y-…no….no…Shall I tell you?…I'm gonna tell you anyway. I'v got standing in my ship, the real, actual crew, from Bleach!" he announced happily "Had a bit of a dimension skid…yeah that's what I said…ah, well, they're trying to find out how many shows they've got left…what?…what'd ya…damn…hello? hello?"

_The Shopkeeper grumbled as he slammed the phone down_

"Can't help you, Staff info only apparently…"

"Damn it!" Ichigo groaned

"Kurosaki, look at this" Uryu said as he handed a Picture to Ichigo

"What is this?" Ichigo asked as he looked at the autographed picture

"Read it" Uryu instructed

"Noriyuki Abe…_Director of the Bleach Anime_"

_Ichigo eye's widened in realisation _

"Guy's, get a phone book" Ichigo instructed

"Why?" Orihime asked

"So we can find Mr Abe's business adress…we're gonna pay him a little visit…"

* * *

_Sorry this chapter took so long, But I've been getting into other Anime apart from Bleach_

_My love for Fist of the North Star has been rekindled with The New PS3 Game and I just started watching Gintama, that last one should explain itself _

_I hunted like a wild beast for Volume 4 of ZombiePowder, I found it and...I was left wanting more_

GO BACK TO IT AFTER YOU FINISH BLEACH, KUBO!

Also, Don't forget to go to my page and vote on my poll!

If you don't-

**I'LL MAKE YOU SUFFER**

...

By Not Updating

...

What'd ya think I meant?


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